The other night I went to see Transformers: Age of Extinction. First thing you need to know about me is that I am pretty much a boy, so I was more than a little excited at the prospect of seeing a film involving robots fighting other robots on giant robot dinosaurs. Alas, I was disappointed. Just shy of three hours long, it stretched way longer than my patience for sitting in an ass-numbing cinema chair did, and by the end credits I was thoroughly bored. I felt the film would have been greatly improved if maybe an hour of the unnecessary scenes were cut. Don’t get me wrong, I love Transformers. At least, I used to watch the cartoons when I was a kid, and thoroughly enjoyed the first film in the franchise. But, it seems with every new Transformers film, things get beyond ridiculous, to the point where you wonder why you paid ten dollars to go and see it, and provide Michael Bay with the money to make another one…or ten.
With a completely different cast and characters, I confess I was left wondering what happened to Sam Witwicky; everything was so different, it might as well have been a different film franchise. The one thing that remained the same however, was the irritating female lead. The Tessa character, played by Nicola Peltz, spends most of the film strutting around in tiny shorts, pretending to be a grown up, getting into situations that require her to be saved and swooning over boyfriend, Shane. And speaking of Jack Reynor, who plays the aforementioned boyfriend, you know a film is bad when even an Irish accent coming from the mouth of a not entirely unattractive man doesn’t improve anything. Even Stanley Tucci didn’t redeem the film, which is a big call for me, given how much I like his acting.
I won’t lie, the special effects and CGI were sensational. I almost believed those giant robot dinosaurs were real. On the flipside, the action scenes – so basically the entire film – in typical Michael Bay fashion, were overdone and overlong. And I know Megatron and the Decepticons are the main antagonists in the cartoons and all but honestly, how many times do you want to kill the same evil robot? Because giving him a fancy new name doesn’t change the fact that Galvatron and Megatron are essentially one and the same.
All in all, I felt the film was lacking. The acting wasn’t up to the standard it could have been, the plot was tiresome and the length, again, was way longer than is strictly necessary. As much as it pains me to admit, I don’t think I can really say I love the Transformers films as a general rule. Which is a shame, because Optimus Prime was my hero when I was a kid. I guess maybe I’m just growing up. Sorry, Autobots but I don’t think this film is worthy of a rating.