I’m pretty frustrated with a lot of things in my life lately. Restless once again, I’m in a position where I wake up every single morning in a state of stress and anxiousness. My head gets overwhelmed with all the things that are causing me to silently panic, and before I even fully realise it, I’m subconsciously setting myself up to have a bad day. It’s not that I’m doing it on purpose, but because I’m so anxious about many things in my life at the moment, I can’t relax, I can’t calm down and I can’t enjoy the day.
It is Saturday. When I woke up this morning, I got up to pee and then went back to bed and hid under my covers. I have an unfinished dress in my sewing room for a client that I could be fixing, or seeing as how it’s quite nice weather, I could go out and soak up some sun and enjoy the day. But instead, I stayed in bed and went over everything in my head, trying desperately to come up with a solution for my current predicaments. It ultimately failed, and I succeeded only in giving myself new things to stress about.
So instead, I got up, made myself a Milo and power cleaned my house. All my frustrated energy went into making my humble abode spotless. In the last hour I have done dishes, washing (and, as I have just discovered, flooded my laundry because the hose slipped out of the sink…ugh), made my bed, folded and put away my clothes, vacuumed the floor, dusted, cleaned the bathroom and counted the coins in my coin jar. I can’t work out how to solve my life problems, but I sure can clean.
If someone would like to offer me a job that pays $1000 a week, give me a pill for motivation and inspiration, find a home for my bunnies that better suits their needs, and gives me at least ten more hours in every day, I would be forever indebted to you. Someone? Anyone? Help…?