I feel a lot of empty right now, kind of like a shell person. Not like, a crab or a lobster kind of shell. More like…a hollow husk of humanness.
Where did that girl go? The one that wasn’t so bitter and jaded? I’m sure she existed, once upon a time. I’ve lost her, though. And I think she’s so lost to me now, that there isn’t even a tiny hope of finding her. This is who I am now.
I hate what these years have made me. They have stolen so much. Left me with so little. And the worst part is, I’m not sure how to move forward. I’m a coward, see. And I am certain I will be stuck here until I die.
You won’t. You think you will, you feel like you will, but you won’t. Be kind to yourself, be gentle with yourself, and do some of the things that used to bring you joy before, whether that’s going to a theme park, or finger painting, or making a mood board, or melting chocolate and making rice krsipie buns.
Take a Time Out. You’re still in there, just… hibernating!